programming quotes

The goal of software architecture is to minimize the human resources required to build and
maintain the required system. The measure of design quality is simply the measure of the effort required to meet the needs of the customer. If that effort is low, and stays low throughout the lifetime of the system, the
design is good. If that effort grows with each new release, the design is bad. It’s as simple as
that. Robert Martin

The ratio of time spent reading code versus writing is well over 10 to 1.

Prefer composition over inheritance as it is more malleable / easy to modify later, but do not use a compose-always approach. Gang of 4

Make it right before you make it faster. Douglas Crockford

Less code to write means less code to test means less code to debug means less code to maintain.

How to make terrible software: 1. Make promises for one-off features for a single client 2. Implement them 3. Repeat. - Ryan Florence

Any fool can write code that a computer can understand. Good programmers programmers write code that humans can understand. M. Fowler

What one programmer can do in one month, two programmers can do in two months. Fred Brooks

Software must be free. Richard Stallman

If you made a decision and you want to change it but you can't, than you made a wrong decision. Jason Fried

Simplicity is prerequisite for reliability. Edsger Dijkstra

Programs must be written for people to read, and only incidentally for machines to execute. Harold Abelson and Gerald Jay Sussman, computer scientists and authors, from The Structure and Interpretation of Computer Programs

A good programmer is someone who looks both ways before crossing a one-way street. Doug Linder, systems administrator

The First Rule of Program Optimization: Don't do it. The Second Rule of Program Optimization (for experts only!): Don't do it yet. Michael A. Jackson

We should forget about small efficiencies, say about 97% of the time: premature optimization is the root of all evil. Yet we should not pass up our opportunities in that critical 3%. A good programmer will not be lulled into complacency by such reasoning, he will be wise to look carefully at the critical code; but only after that code has been identified. Donald Knuth

There is no code that is more flexible than no code. The "secret" to good software design wasn't in knowing what to put into the code; it was in knowing what to leave out! Brad Appleton

The first 90 percent of the code accounts for the first 90 percent of the development time…The remaining 10 percent of the code accounts for the other 90 percent of the development time.
Tom Cargill

Most of you are familiar with the virtues of a programmer. There are three, of course: laziness, impatience, and hubris.
Larry Wall

Measuring programming progress by lines of code is like measuring aircraft building progress by weight.
Bill Gates

Debugging is twice as hard as writing the code in the first place. Therefore, if you write the code as cleverly as possible, you are, by definition, not smart enough to debug it.
Brian W. Kernighan

Once a new technology starts rolling, if you’re not part of the steamroller, you’re part of the road.
Stewart Brand

In theory, there is no difference between theory and practice. But, in practice, there is.
Jan L. A. van de Snepscheut

The hardest part of design … is keeping features out.
Donald Norman

Before software can be reusable it first has to be usable.
Ralph Johnson

If debugging is the process of removing bugs, then programming must be the process of putting them in.
Edsger Dijkstra

Software and cathedrals are much the same – first we build them, then we pray.
Sam Redwine

The goal of Computer Science is to build something that will last at least until we’ve finished building it.
Anonymous Consultant

The software isn’t finished until the last user is dead.
Anonymous Support Group Member

Better train people and risk they leave – than do nothing and risk they stay.
Anonymous Technical Trainer

Programming is 10% science, 20% ingenuity, and 70% getting the ingenuity to work with the science.
Anonymous Scientist

All programmers are playwrights and all computers are lousy actors.
Anonymous Hack Actor

Bad code isn’t bad, its just misunderstood.
Anonymous Code Behaviorist

It is easier to measure something than to understand what you have measured.
Anonymous Analyst

The sooner you get behind in your work, the more time you have to catch up.
Anonymous Scheduler

When a programming language is created that allows programmers to program in simple English, it will be discovered that programmers cannot speak English.
Anonymous Linguist

Benchmarks don’t lie, but liars do benchmarks.
Anonymous Tester

Why do we never have time to do it right, but always have time to do it over?
Anonymous Code Monkey

programming quotes

Computers are useless. They can only give you answers. Pablo Picasso

Programming Humor

Question: What kind of doctor fixes broken websites?
Answer: An URLologist.

How many programmers does it take to change a light bulb?
- None, its hardware problem.

Project Manager is a person who thinks nine women can deliver a baby in one month.

A user interface is like a joke. If you have to explain it, it’s not that good.

A SQL query goes into a bar, walks up to two tables and asks, "Can I join you?"

How many software testers does it take to change a light bulb?
- None. Software testers just noticed that the room was dark. Testers don't fix the problems, they just find them.

An SEO expert walks into a bar, bars, beer garden, hangout, lounge, night club, mini bar, bar stool, tavern, pub, beer.

An optimist will tell you the glass is half-full; the pessimist, half-empty; and the engineer will tell you the glass is twice the size it needs to be.

The problem with GIT jokes is that everyone has their own version.

People can be divided into two groups: those who do backups, and those who will.

There are only 10 types of people in the world: those who understand binary and those who don't.

A guy walks into a bar and asks for 1.4 root beers. The bartender says "I'll have to charge you extra, that's a root beer float".
The guy says "In that case, better make it a double."

There are two hard things in computer science: cache invalidation, naming things, and off-by-one errors.

Whats the object-oriented way to become wealthy?

Why do programmers prefer dark mode?
Because light attracts bugs.

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